Dealing with a negative reaction to your pregnancy announcement

Worried about how to respond if someone has a negative reaction to your pregnancy announcement? Check out these tips for staying calm and handling the situation gracefully.

Discovering you’re pregnant can bring about a range of different emotions, whether you planned for it or not. Whilst most of us may be expecting positive responses to the big news, you may have found that your partner, family, or friends aren’t as supportive as you might have hoped. Whilst it can certainly be upsetting, we’ve outlined some ways that you can work through the situation without stressing yourself and your baby

Give them time

You can’t force a specific reaction out of people. If you’ve broken the news and someone has given you a less-than-ideal response, it would be a good idea to give them space. Trying to argue with the other person will only cause further hurt feelings, especially if the news has come as a shock to them.

Emotions may be running high and upsetting things may be said, which is why the both of you need to process what’s happened. Remove yourself from the situation, as this will best ensure you don’t get caught up in a needless argument. Whatever their reason for reacting badly, it’s not your responsibility to try and fix the situation. 

Focus on your wellbeing

There could be several reasons why someone reacted the way they did, such as out of concern over your financial or relationship status, jealousy, or frustration (especially if they’ve been trying to conceive). During this time, it’s important to focus on your mental health

Whilst it’s certainly easier said than done, removing yourself from the situation until the negative reactions have simmered down will be a good way to ensure that you’re not engaging in any hurtful conversations with family and friends that could take away from your exciting news. 

The more you argue with your loved ones about this topic, the more it derails from this special moment. If you find that they’re not coming around positively to your news, you may want to consider the relationship you have with this person or people, and how this might negatively affect your wellbeing during the rest of your pregnancy. 

Consider adjusting how you make the announcement

Whilst some reactions may come from a place of insensitivity, some may be an unintentional response to how you’ve delivered the news. For example, if you’re casually telling people that you’re expecting a baby, they might think that you’re unexcited by the news or that you don’t think it’s special. 

Consider sitting down with your partner to discuss the best way to share the good news with others. This could be as simple as opening up the conversation with a statement like ‘we’re excited to share some news with you’, so that they know this is important to you. If you suspect that someone might have a negative reaction to the news, it could be worth asking someone you trust to sit with you. They can offer support in sharing your excitement when you announce your pregnancy. 

Setting boundaries

If someone really won’t come around to your pregnancy announcement, consider setting boundaries for your wellbeing. If you’d still like the person to be a part of your life, you can avoid bringing up pregnancy and baby topics around them. Although simply avoiding important topics isn’t good for your wellbeing, sometimes it’s the best solution, especially if the person is a family member who you can’t cut off.

However, if their negative reaction has really hurt you and you’ve decided that you don’t want this person to be in your life anymore, you can figure out the best way to go about this. Try to communicate with the person about your feelings; if they’re not willing to compromise, you may be better off cutting contact with them as you embark on your pregnancy journey. 

Final thoughts from Kami

Although it can be tempting to get defensive with friends and family members who aren’t being supportive of your pregnancy, it’s important to remember that the wellbeing of yourself and your baby is essential. It can be hurtful when you aren’t met with the same enthusiasm and excitement you initially hoped for, but don’t let this ruin the start of a very exciting journey that you’re about to embark on. 

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